Dealing with overthinking: tips to stop rumination
We tend to overthink things if we believe that our safety, self-worth or reputation is at stake. It is hard to stop overthinking because we often feel it helps us to understand where we stand. In fact it just confuses us more. Overthinking and ruminating shake our confidence, question our worth, make us put things off and drain our energy.
3 steps to help you stop overthinking:
1) Learn to differentiate it from analyzing a situation which is aimed at problem solving. Ask yourself: What am I focusing on? What do I get from thinking about it? How do I feel after?
2) Take back control over the situation by coming up with an action plan rather than dwelling on negative effects of what happened or might happen. If something can be done to resolve the problem it is great, if not – acceptance and forgiveness is your solution. Being compassionate to yourself and others is a powerful skill.
3) Say it out loud that no matter what YOU ARE ENOUGH. YOU ARE OK. Take care of yourself by choosing acceptance over judging, forgiveness over blaming, support over finding faults.
It is also helpful to keep in mind:
Just because a thought makes sense it doesn’t mean it is true. We have all sorts of thoughts, they come and go if we don’t cling to them. Stop taking your thoughts as a fundamental truth, start doing fact checking. Stop identifying yourself with your toxic thoughts, and learn to observe them without believing them.
If you keep on pondering on your toxic thoughts it means you take them seriously – well, you need to start questioning them. Our negative thoughts are based on our core beliefs, which is why they seem to be so true. CBT therapy and mindfulness practice both work miracles when we deal with intrusive thoughts.
Ⓒ Natalia Ladonycheva
Psychologist and CBT Therapist